I have always been a metalhead. Pantera was the first real metal band that I listened to because, looking back on it, all the hair metal and Van Halen and even Guns N' Roses weren't really Metal. Far Beyond Driven was the first heavy album that I got into with Pantera. I like all kinds of metal, from Black Metal to Death Metal to hard and heavy rock and roll.
Most of the guys in these bands are spindly geeks, which definitely affects whether I like the band or not. At least Pantera's lead singer, Phil Anselmo, boxes and is a legit boxing historian. I think when Appetite for Destruction came out, Axl weighed like 137 pounds or something. He needed to chain himself to the squat rack for 10 years
As far as Pantera goes, I don't like the first album with Phil trying to sing like Rob Halford. Vulgar Display of Power was on the right track, but their last three albums were heavy as hell. I saw Pantera with Slayer on the railing twice, and I saw them with Morbid Angel and Static-X, and I have seen Phil Anselmo's other bands multiple times: Down and Superjoint Ritual. Superjoint may be my all-time favorite, especially the first album, Use Once and Destroy. I like all of his music, especially the really hard pissed off at the world from his younger days. He was singing about personal power and not being trendy, and the music and musicians were unreal.
The cool part of those smaller bands is that they tour in smaller venues, places that hold around two thousand people. On the tour with Down, a few of the times my wife and I purchased Meet and Greet tickets where you get a picture with the band and you go to soundcheck. You usually say hello and say a sentence or two, and then you move on. These guys are musicians that I have listened to since 1994, a damn long time. All of this going to concerts stuff took place in the early two 2000's, before kids came along. Can't go to concerts when there is travel baseball for three days in Pennsylvania. However, when I saw Down was coming on tour, I thought there would be an opportunity after all of these years to see them again. Plus, it would be a great birthday present for my wife. Now, life has changed some; one kid is in college, and the other is old enough to stay by himself, so off we went. Down didn't come to Philly this tour, which is around forty-five minutes to an hour away from where I live in South Jersey. Instead, the closest venue was in Maryland, which is where I am from, so I knew of the venue: the Fillmore in Silver Spring. Again, I bought the Meet and Greet tickets. We had to be there by three PM, and we stood in line for a half hour past three for some unknown reason. Fuck being late. Be on time. That shit drives me crazy. So the security guard and a lady who worked for them came out, and you tell her your name, and then she scrolls for your name on her phone, and the guy has all these badges, and he's fumbling with them and dropping them on the ground, trying to get them separated. A table with a list and the badges separated would be more efficient, but what do I know?
I almost forgot: the security guard, who was around fifty years old, about two hundred and fifty pounds, not muscular at all, with tattoos on his head and all that, gave us a speech about not asking for autographs because we are getting an autographed poster, and then he said it again and again about not asking for autographs, like we were school children, all one hundred of us, with less that twenty of us under forty years old. He gave off a dick vibe right away. I started thinking, who the fuck is he gonna stop? I don't know; maybe he was a bad motherfucker like Jonah Hill, who knows?
So we walked in, and they were already doing soundcheck, and then we walked in and stood at the railing. The band was five feet from us, which, if you are going to see a band, is the best place to be. Phil sang a Robin Trower song, and then he said he would see us in a few minutes and left. The rest of the band kept tuning instruments for a bit. Then we were ushered out of the venue and then brought back in. The band was now behind the barricade by the stage. In the old days, you'd put your arms around them and take a pic, like you were old buddies. But I get it, people are crazy these days. I walked up, shook hands with all of them, and Phil put his fist out to bump, so I did. He had dark glasses on and didn't say much. Not a dick, just looked bored of all of it. We left the venue for a few hours to eat until the doors opened for the show.
But the meet-and-greet got me thinking: How tired do the members of the band get of doing that stuff- the meet-and-greet, the touring, riding a bus all over? When they got to us in Maryland, they'd been touring with no days off for a while. Phil was clearly bored. The other guys were fine, but you could sense some weariness. And why are they touring? No way they need the money; Phil just toured with Pantera for a few years, and they were also doing stadium tours with Metallica. All of them should be comfortable with money at least, but especially Phil. Or is it for the love of it? Do they still love it as much as when they started? Does everything, no matter how much money you are making, get boring and tiring after a while? I mean, even Tommy Lee got tired of Pamela Anderson, right?
I felt sort of stupid walking in to meet the band. I'm 58 years old, and honestly don't really give a shit about the band, and I don't give a shit if I meet anyone in the world at my age. I like the music, that's it. It was a birthday present, so I didn't mind, but it definitely is not the same as when you are in your 30's. Plus, I was dead sober this time, and every time before, I had some drinks beforehand, and I was loose as hell. It's hard to put my finger on it, but something was bothering me. First off, the silliness of standing out in the heat with some doofus security guard telling me what to do to meet a bunch of guys who play instruments. And the crowd, a bunch of us trying to live in the 80's and 90's, with all of our music favorites getting older and some kicking the bucket. And it made me sad that where I grew up has turned so shitty. People ruin everything for everybody else. Fuck it.
So we went to eat, walking past a homeless man sleeping in the bushes. I grew up in Maryland and was quite proud of growing up there. But now? It is a total shithole. Baltimore is beyond dangerous; I never go there anymore. Crime is out of control, and even Ocean City, Maryland, has gone to shit, and this happens when a state is corrupt and woke and stupid as hell. Remember that bridge in Baltimore that got hit by a tanker? Is it fixed yet? Nope. It will never get fixed. The mayor will say it's racist that it's not fixed.
I kept thinking about the security guard and what a dick he was, and wondered why anyone ever thinks they are better than anyone else. What a bitch. I started picturing all kinds of things, how to circle away from his right hand, getting inside, going for his liver...
After eating and a horrific Irish coffee, we went into the venue. I paid for special balcony seats, and after the bitch of an usher showed us our seats, I realized that you can't see the band because there is a railing right in front of your face. Ripoff. So we went down and stood at the barrier in front of the stage. They hadn't let everyone in yet, so we secured a cherry position, again six feet from the band. The problem with doing that, going right up to the railing, is that it is such a coveted spot that you can't leave it. I knew that I would have to piss like a racehorse when the night was over, but it was a sacrifice I was willing to make. I kept thinking about POWs surviving shit and reasoned that I could stand here for a few hours if they could survive torture.
Fortunately, we didn't have to wait long for the first band to come on.
Spirit in the Room was the first band. The lead singer had some charisma; the band was tight. It's metal but seemed to have a STP vibe, and maybe the singer was going for a Weiland vibe. Either way, they were good.
Helmet was next. I know they are talented. Lots of bass. I have never heard them before, and they are not at all what I like, but I can see the appeal if you like stuff like Prong.
Down came on next. The place was packed. They opened up with Bloodoath, their new single. Love that song. All the songs were great; the band has been together so long, they never miss a beat. Many songs were from their first album, Nola. Most in the crowd knew every word. I am always surprised that people like the band as much as we do.
Years ago, Phil would get a conversation going with the crowd, taking joints from the crowd, drinking beer, commenting on signs hanging up, or commenting on a fight in the crowd. It was part of what made the show great. Now, he is sober also, so maybe that has something to do with it. I have been at a show where he forgot the words to a song because, I assume, of inebriation, but we all loved it. "Hey, Phil is all fucked up just like we are." This time, I think he was stone sober. He used to end the concerts with stuff like, "Drop acid, smoke weed and eat pussy 'til your jaw breaks!" Now they all blow kisses to the crowd.
Every song by Down was excellent; we were 6 feet from them the whole time, and I am glad that I got to see them before they stop touring. I couldn't shake the feeling that this has become rote for the band, but maybe it is just me, seeing it all with a sober, older gaze. But there was an energy missing, both from the band and from myself.
When I was young, concerts were an event; they had almost a dangerous feeling. In the crowd at this show, a kid was dressed up as a banana, and he kept crowd surfing right by me. A banana? Twenty years ago, it was a bunch of biker-gang-looking dudes and biker-gang old ladies in the crowd. Now? Us old fucks and a kid dressed up as a banana.
