Saturday, September 22, 2018

All The Daily Dirt

Do you find that all the bull that you deal with day to day doesn't mean a whole lot as each day ends?

Do you think that most of the things that you do could be done with or without you? 

You ever feel like everyone is so damn stupid chasing something that they can never catch?

Are you one of those people who sit in meetings and you understand what the topic is and the conclusions within the first five minutes and the rest of the time you are doodling and thinking, is this how they justify their jobs? By having meeting after meeting with useless jargon that really doesn't mean anything but everyone nods their heads like something brilliant is being said but its just people talking about the "lowest hanging fruit" and let's discuss the next meeting time to discuss what we just discussed. And you are looking around like, am I the only one who knows that this is a waste?

Find that somedays you feel out of touch? Like everything is moving fast by you but going nowhere and people look at you funny , like they are all saying hey you just get with the program but you feel like just dropping out of it all? There is no program for you to be part of, because you feel out on the edge while everyone else is all huddled together on the inside sharing a secret that you aren't a part of?

Throw away all thoughts that the way that you feel is wrong and all the news blaring how you just aren't with everyone else because you have different thoughts than the masses, spoon fed their thoughts by the big whatever corporations and special interests groups that bank on all of us staying blind and dumb to every real thing that is really poisoning us and killing our kids and paving the way for a future that is bleak, dank and dismal? 

You better believe that your gut feelings are right, that soon its gonna be over and the things that are preoccupying everyones mind are useless and meaningless and you are looking for some answers as the walls seem to be closing in on you at a pace that sure seems fast, fast moving like all bad things move and all good things move so slowly and don't last nearly long enough as you would like.

Your mind goes back to the past and the past always seems  great, but you always remember the great stuff and pack away the bad stuff somewhere where you mind can't touch it except in the darkest times but sometimes that bad stuff has a mind of its own and it comes bubbling up when you need it the least.

And the tv talk show hosts and the know -it -alls keep espousing this positive thinking and this mindset that you need to be successful and to be happy but you know that the happiness is just a place that nobody really reaches and you stop and say to yourself, self, I am outta here, I am into my mind, not the idea of what the popular notion is on what is real, and you have no interests in getting all involved in the silliness of life, what most attach meaning to but you just can't see it or feel it. 

Much of it seems fake and out there and a place that you don't want to go and you couldn't even if you tried. And you wonder what would it be like, what would happen if everyone just dropped out of the pushing towards everybody and instead walked away from it all, just put down the material stuff, cut up all the credit cards and said, screw Walmart and Amazon and the cell phones and smiled and destroyed the big buildings that house the evil and instead replaced them with woods and open meadows and made folks survive and be themselves without airs or qualms about who has more and instead it would be better to have less and the less you carry is better, you can move like that, you can be free and go where you must go in a pace that you want, not dictated by the traffic or gas prices or whatever thats invented to hold you back from being truly alone without the brainwashing. 

And I know what is realistic and what is not and that with all the technology that gets on my nerves and drives me crazy comes essential needs that keep us alive more than ever and without the medicine and surgical techniques and advances in science some of us , including myself, may not be around. Maybe there is a way to separate the needed from the useless. 

But I am not talking about the advances that are used for good, I am talking about the distractions that bring us down, the posts on Instagram of how great everyone is doing that serve to make you feel like crap about your life,  and the lack of mystery about a lot of things, the fact that the latest controversy that is really just click bait is right there poisoning your soul.

 All that you need in the new world is a bag filled with essentials, and the dirt under your bare feet just like when you were a kid. When all the moments were right in front of you and the creek was what your destination was, just to drop a fishing line and not think too much or when you were given the task of chopping wood for the first time or had to heave some hay bales on a hot South Carolina day or squatted outside in the snow with nothing on but some shorts and a t-shirt and within you, you found something so pure in the effort, and the euphoria of the sweaty exhaustion brought a sense that this was the type of day that you were meant to have, it felt so natural and brought you back to some place and time were you felt like you were meant to reside more often, and that feeling that you achieved and  loved was worth striving to reach whenever the times felt confusing or strange or you just didn't feel a part of it . 

And you think that maybe if everyone had that feeling, if they could have that feeling every day at some point, that things would change, that we would fall back to the times before the useless waste of the days that are leaving without much meaning.

All About Being a Lifer

What's a Lifer? Someone who isn't in to something for just a day, a month, a's for life. Whether its training or your family or your doesn't matter. You work at it, you build on it, you see the big picture . You don't miss workouts because it means something to you. You are like a Shakespearean actor- no matter what is going on in your life, you block it out when it's time to train. You walk into the weight room and all else disappears. Worry about it later.