Monday, November 10, 2014

Mirror Thoughts

It rings in my head
smiling, frowning, lunging for the ringing phone
Learning so much, soak it up like a sponge and then hope to forget it all
My god... the distant Warrior
simple plan
secrets and denial
If the greatest of all is mortal
has the end of the circle reconstructed itself?
round and round...
it all goes.
And the smoke leaves the hole that once held a deep heart
new, new, new
Feel the crunch of bone on bone
the euphoria of a death shot
the wilting of the halo
if one knows it all means nothing
I reckon we are truly all free
Define exactly the important parts of your disjointed machinery
Dark New Jersey streets
the fan whips my curtains and the leftover toys of a joyous summer of hugs and love
is gone along with the innocent voices and laughter. C'mon, it is the end of it is too much...
come back and be here every morning...I can't tolerate the pictures in my mind...
Why do the pictures never tell the story?
I have seen those sad eyes before
learn to say goodbye, amazing how the human being can adapt
to separation.
So sad for the forgotten one
We are all in different houses in different places crying the same lonely tears
Reconstructing the best times
But I picture the wires circling him
keeping him breathing
screaming my name above all others
Holding the soft hands in the middle of the night as they unknowingly sqeeze my fingers
by reflex.
gotta move, gotta keep moving
standing still makes my mind work overtime
dont think, just punch
dont think just roll and throw
Monsters under the bed, not just a child's scary nightmare
Monsters in my mind
demons in the web
that is my brain
look under there
It is my warrior calling
He has found me, I was right here the whole time
And then after the 5th hour
running to him, please dont cry so much, I cant get there any faster, churning legs, pumping arms, wait I am here, Your face is swollen, you will be fine, I will not let you NOT be fine
I will WILL it to happen, to make you better
My life is not mine
Put the cast on me
Put the scars on me
You don't even know you have them,that they exist
Each one represents my punishment
I would wear each one proudly
Float to me, scars of pain...

All About Being a Lifer

What's a Lifer? Someone who isn't in to something for just a day, a month, a's for life. Whether its training or your family or your doesn't matter. You work at it, you build on it, you see the big picture . You don't miss workouts because it means something to you. You are like a Shakespearean actor- no matter what is going on in your life, you block it out when it's time to train. You walk into the weight room and all else disappears. Worry about it later.